1. |
California Glory
01:30
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Hopeless naps on benches next to California glory
I turn to myself for conversation
But small talks only getting boring
I keep walking into spider webs that only slice me to bits (my mind is stuck in your net)
I'm caught in the thought of whether or not I was right to start all this
The umbrellas don't really block the rain
They just divert it down to our feet and create puddles of disdain (every droplet hydrates my skin but my thirst is never quenched)
Leaving us to stand and soak in our own defeat
Hail down on me (different title, same dim hallways, different schedule, same routine)
Ignorance is all this is
Hopeless naps on benches next to California Glory
I've turned to myself for conversation but this is only getting boring
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2. |
Fears and Doubts
02:34
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Will silence ever exist once more inside this head?
With a good day’s rest I’m lucky at best to ever meet standards again
The falling rain floods through my veins
A storm is brewing
I’m not the same
I wish it could just be written on my forehead: 'I suggest you stay away'
My clothes don’t feel the way they used to
My sheets don’t keep me warm anymore
Within the past four months I have left my old mind
Yet, I’m more scared than ever before
My voice speaks out, but from a bloody tongue
I think my mind is right
I just need legs to run me away from the forks in the road
Because Yogi’s words are the only map I know
They say, “Spend for profit.”
But, I’ve been too cheap
And I won’t buy the time to get myself on my feet
I’ve spent four years working my ass off on subjects that don’t mean shit to me
I feel I’ve wasted time
That’s what gets me the most
Your expectations are virus
My body is the host
I think I’ve found the cure
I’ve free’d my mind and moved on to better things
I’m tired of focusing on things I don’t care about
I’ve been held back by my fear and doubt
My lack of courage weighs the same as this ball and chain
I know this game
This time I’ll have the upper hand
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3. |
Cabin Fever
02:34
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I'm having a funeral for all the time I've wasted
Said that I was living but I have to face this
And realize that I'm not spending my
Days the way I want to before I die
I see my reflection flash in the cars that pass
It seems like the world around me moves too fast
Cabin fever starts to settle in
Because I spend too much time up in my own head
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4. |
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I'm tired of caring about what happens
I just want this all to be for the best
My doubts and unfed wonders are clawing voids inside my chest
I've wasted too much time digging holes to fill with gratitude
The shovel's worn, splintered hold reflects my current mood
I know we can't always climb out from what has been dug
You were reaching your hand out so I pulled and tugged
I guess the strength that I gave you all those times wasn't enough
Now I'm stuck 6 feet deep with dirt above my head
The tombstone above, marking my soil bed
reads "each step that I took dug a little bit deeper"
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